The Power of Ejaculatory Choice Guest Blog by Destin Gerek

by Jaiya

When you attain true ejaculatory choice, the world changes for you. Something in your body relaxes.

If you are like most people, you want to feel at cause in life rather than at the effect of life. You want to feel like you have control of your destiny, control over your finances, and have a choice in the partner that you are with, rather than feel like you’re just settling for whatever comes your way.

You want to feel like you have choice and control of your body rather than simply being at the whim of whatever your body does to you. In short, you want to feel at empowered choice in all of life. And your own body is the foundation of that.

But we don’t get any education and training around sexual self-mastery or ejaculatory choice, or how to navigate this powerful sexual energy inside of us.

So, often it can seem like either we have to repress it because it’s not okay, or let it control us and run the show. Sexual self-mastery and ejaculatory choice are the doors to a better, more potent way of expressing our sexuality.

Many people do find their way to modulating the intensity of their sexual energy and lasting longer—and many don’t.

An entire industry has built up to help men solve premature ejaculation.

Millions and millions of dollars are spent on pills, and creams, and what in my opinion are subpar online programs because millions and millions of people don’t learn and figure this out on their own. They develop patterns in their body, patterns in their neurology, and unconscious energetic patterns that drive them towards rapid ejaculation.

Penis bodied individuals who are dealing with this as an issue are suffering tremendously from it. Hence, why there is so much money to be made in that field. And too many unscrupulous individuals and businesses are happy to make a buck, selling you snake oil because they know you can feel desperate.

What I found through working with so many people all over the world is that, when you feel like you don’t have control in this area, it can affect all aspects of your life.

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It can leave you in a state of disempowerment that bleeds over into everything that you do. It can cause you to feel like ‘less of a man’.

Conversely, when you do have sexual self-mastery and walk through that first gate of ejaculatory choice, you gain a certain swagger to your step.

It’s like you walk with your head held a little higher. You have a deep sense of confidence in your being, as you are relaxed knowing that you don’t have that fear or concern when it comes to your sex.

When you have true ejaculatory choice and have mastered your sexuality, it changes how you show up in the sexual interaction. You shift the energetic pattern away from the constant driving force towards ejaculation and direct that energy to coming fully into the present moment-to-moment play.

You learn to be able to hold and contain your sexual energy. It can flow freely without restriction and move through your entire body, allowing you to last as long as you want. This allows you to feel more pleasure throughout your entire body.

Something completely changes for your lover and their sexual experience, too. When they know that you can last as long as you like, they don’t feel like they have to be chasing their orgasm, trying to make sure that they come before your ticking time bomb blows.

When your lover can relax, it gives them the ability to soften more fully into their feminine, to surrender more fully into their body and all of the pleasure that they’re truly capable of experiencing, which opens up whole new levels of orgasmic possibility.

The skills that you need to learn and to integrate into your body to have ejaculatory choice and sexual self-mastery change how you experience your body, how you experience sex, how you experience your lovers, and how you experience the world.

To have true ejaculatory choice, to experience full body orgasms, to experience non-ejaculatory orgasms and male multiple orgasms, it’s imperative you learn to truly feel: to be in your body and feel deeply.

You must learn to feel and attune to energetic subtleties, to be present to the moment by moment reality of your body.

Unfortunately, too many of us at present are far too numb to achieve this. By deepening into subtle sensation and deepening into your felt sense, you can notice and attune to what’s happening for a lover that you’re engaging with.

Opening to feel changes the game: it’s not just a mental game of trying to figure out what to do and figure out what they want. You can feel it. And when you can feel it, you can sense into your lover, and respond moment by moment—which unlocks whole new levels of sexual possibilities.

Everything changes when you have sexual self-mastery.

When you attain sexual self-mastery, you become self-sourced. You are in connection with that life-force energy itself.

When you show up from a place of fullness, with your sexuality as a gift, in contrast to showing up from lack, where sex is something you need and have to get out of your lover, the energetic dynamic is completely different and far more potent and enjoyable for everyone involved.

When you have true ejaculatory choice, you can literally last as long as you want to; you can consciously choose whether you want to have a two-minute quickie, twenty minutes of hot sex, two hours of steamy sex, go two days without ejaculating, or two weeks, two months, or even two years without ejaculating.

It sounds like an exaggeration, but with true ejaculatory choice, time is irrelevant. Time becomes irrelevant because once you learn how to take your sexual energy as it’s being generated in your groin, in your cock, and your balls and spread it throughout your entire body, it diffuses the ticking time bomb of ejaculation.

As your sexual energy generates, it spreads throughout the body. You learn different ways of releasing it through and from the body aside from just out the tip of your cock with ejaculation. And so with that ability to move the sexual energy at will, to disperse that energy at will, you’re no longer a slave to your need to come.

There’s no risk of blowing.

The false programming we have been sold is that if you don’t ejaculate, it’s going to be uncomfortable or even painful – that does not have to be true.

By learning to circulate your sexual energy out from your pelvis, any potential discomfort will dissipate too. You can learn to enjoy running sexual energy in your body without a need for that final moment. That’s not to say that you can’t have that final moment. It’s not to say that you can’t ejaculate.

Ejaculatory orgasms can be incredible, and quite frankly, through this process, you can learn to experience ejaculatory orgasms that are the most powerful of your life.

The key is that you will learn to have ejaculatory choice where YOU can choose to ejaculate, where YOU can choose not to ejaculate as well as where you can choose when to. And if you choose to, you can find incredible fulfillment in any of those choices.

How does having a total choice, total control over your ejaculation sound to you?

Learn the two simple tools that you can implement TONIGHT to begin gaining greater control and embark on the path of Sexual Self-Mastery:

>> Get 2 easy tools for Sexual Self Mastery << 

Destin Gerek is an internationally recognized leading voice in masculinity, sexuality, and personal empowerment with over 20 years experience. Recognizing the need for new role models for men in these changing times, Destin is dedicated to redefining masculinity for the 21st century. Destin is the author of the forthcoming book “The Evolved Masculine: Be the Man the World Needs, and The One She Craves.”

You can find out more at and follow him on Facebook @DestinGerekProfile, on Instagram @EvolvedMasculine, or by emailing him at

*** Note from team Jaiya! Destin Gerek has been a colleague of ours for over a decade. He is a powerhouse coach who holds a standard of integrity that is rare in the realm of masculinity and sexuality teachers. Destin offers transformational coaching services and, if you choose to work with Destin, Jaiya, Inc. will receive a commission! Yippee!!
We love sharing the best with you, so we only partner with leaders and coaches we trust! Destin’s got the goods!

There are 5 Erotic Blueprint Types™

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“Our compatibility has gone through the roof…how to be pleased. How to ask to be sexually pleased. How to please you (your partner) sexually. How to experience not only the orgasms we were already having and the ecstatic pleasure that we were already living, but now to have it magnify and multiply and go to whole new levels. It feels like we’re starting our relationship again!“

Satyen and Suzanne Raja

Embrace what has been buried and shamed in your body for thousands of years.

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