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Whitney Lowery

American living in Portugal (virtual everywhere)


I sit with women who are tired of self-sacrificing, feeling responsible for everything and everyone, and abandoning themselves so they’re not abandoned by others.

Who specifically do you like to help/serve?

My path has been one of dissolving and releasing my tendency to abandon myself so that I’m not abandoned by others, and those are the women who are drawn to me. I lovingly refer to these beautiful humans as bitter bitches, and underneath their resentment and contempt, I see their pain, as I carried the same pain myself for most of my life.

[I work with cis-gendered, heterosexual women because that is my lived experience and represents the dynamics and ecosystem I am most skilled with traversing.]

I work with Bitter Bitches, women who:
• Continually choose self-harm over self-care, and want a deeper experience of self-care than bath bombs, candles and spa days
• Abandon and sacrifice what they want, what they need, what nourishes and energizes them, because they feel responsible for caretaking everyone else -- the feelings, moods, attitudes, needs and lives of the people who surround them -- and the weight and expectation of all that responsibility is draining, exhausting and deadening
• Always feel like they’re either too much or not enough (which are actually the same thing)
• Override their boundaries in order to please others, and self-sacrifice as though it makes them superior to all those “selfish” or “inconsiderate” people
• Dilute their desires, and survive on less than what satiates them, so they’re not perceived as high-maintenance, needy, burdensome, or weak
• Consistently censor themselves so they’re more palatable, likeable, loveable, good
• Are stuck in cycles of complaining, giving most or all of their attention to what's not working, what's wrong, what they don't want...but with little to no awareness of what they actually want and how to ask for it
• Are caught up in who's right or wrong, who's fault it is, but are genuinely sick of playing the blame game
• Are cruel to themselves, easily find fault with themselves, and have a habit of making themselves deficient, broken or wrong for everything
• Are tired of venting their victimization to anyone who will listen, and are ready to give up their addiction to the moral high-ground of being in the “right”
• Want more heat, more creativity, more love-drunk orgasmic bliss, more surrender and deep love
• Desire to feel radiant, playful, powerful and free
• Have read the books, taken the courses and nothing is working!

I see you, sister. I see your heart, your hurt and your longing.

And here is what I know: Information is not transformation. Sometimes we want a witch to support us with our adventure through the ancient forest. We want breadcrumbs, the old crone wisdom that shows up exactly when we need it, spells that lift the fog, a magickal mirror to remind us of our power and our dream. I am that bitch and that witch. Especially if your fetish is self-victimization, self-sacrifice or self-abandonment. If you’re stewing in resentment and blame. Woman, I know those waters like the seals know the sea. Come swim with me.


1:1 virtual coaching, group coaching on self-love and embodiment