When is the last time your soul begged to be taken to new heights of passion?
If your body/mind/soul doesn’t ask for more than what you’re used to experiencing…
If you find yourself in the ruts of falling into the comfort of the same positions, looking for the same turn-ons…
If you find yourself thinking, “There has to be more than this!” when you’re right in the middle of sex…
It may be that you are suffering from some form of sexual stagnation that is not only robbing you of the pleasure your body and mind seek, but is also bleeding over into other areas of your life, making life feel dull and lifeless.
Take a deep breath.
Feel into what’s going on around you.
Feel into what’s going on inside you.
Feel into the breath that fills your body when you breathe.
Stagnation is real. Especially in a time like this when many of us are social distancing, not going out like we normally would, and are taking safety measures to not only stay healthy, but to prevent others from getting sick.
But many may not realize that sexual stagnation haunts them, they just feel frustrated and out-of-step with life.
Symptoms of Sexual Stagnation:
- The same sexual positions over and over again
- Repetitive approaches to turn-ons that begin to fail to actually do what we want them to do
- Not wanting to do anything at all so skipping sex altogether
- Frustration with your partner(s) because they aren’t stagnating and are more active than you care to be
- A feeling pulling at you that there has to be more, especially during or after sex
The Good News
The good news is that there are simple fixes for sexual stagnation. You don’t have to allow those seeds of resentment to grow any bigger. The change you crave is just a decision away.
Undoing the doing of sexual stagnation is a matter of making a decision and sticking to it.
The Bad News
The bad news is that our habitual beings may balk at having to get uncomfortable. Our habitual self likes order. To some degree, you could say it enjoys stagnation. Stagnation is safe for them.
Stagnation can feel like home.
Getting Out of Sexual Stagnation
Talk to your partner(s) about your plan. Ask for their support. Ask them if they want to join you. If not, make no judgment, feel into no fear, just allow them to support YOUR decision to call in newness and excitement to break the sexual stagnation that plagues all areas of your life.
Try One Thing
To help reduce the overwhelm of trying something new, commit to trying one thing new each day or week. If you can handle one thing a day, that’s ideal. But if you find it too stressful, pull back to once a week. Anything new is better than nothing new.
Even When You Don’t Want To…Do It
When our habits are threatened, our “ease” and “comfort” stand to be lost, our minds will find ways to stop us from doing the thing that we need to do the most. And those things will feel like real, legitimate excuses when it’s just fear talking. So when you find yourself saying, “I can’t because…” Stop. Do it anyway.
Stagnation is consistent. Why can’t change be? Do not allow yourself to miss your days of curiosity, of newness. Because the more consistently you step away from “comfort”, the more consistently you can find the sparks that ignite you…that help you enjoy your life more.
Sexual stagnation bleeds into every area of our lives when we suffer with it. But it doesn’t have to. When we recognize the symptoms, we can take action and course correct to create a life and a sexual adventure that’s fulfilling and satisfying.