“You’re not meeting my needs.”

“I need more sex!”

“I need to feel desired, craved. If things don’t change, I’ve got to find another lover or maybe I’m just done!”

Have you ever felt these painful frustrations in your relationship?

These were all things I actually said to my partner Ian a couple years into our relationship when things were beyond bleak.

I was a sex expert, teaching others how to have sexual satisfaction, but my own relationship was a barren, sexless desert.

I knew every technique in the book, in fact, I had written 3 books all about sex techniques and made multiple DVD series on the subject and I couldn’t get my own partner to have sex with me.

My juicy sexuality was shriveling on the vine. I was desperate!

I had to figure out a solution or get out!

The good news is, we figured it out and Ian and I have an insanely hot attraction for each other 10 years into our love affair!

In this quick video, we share the icky stuff that almost ended our relationship…

We could have quit!

We could have been lazy and believed that we were simply sexually incompatible.

But I was determined to put 15 years of my work with clients, clinical research and the deep study of the science and art of sexual satisfaction to work in solving the dissatisfaction and resentments that had consumed my own love life.

This is when Erotic Blueprints™ bloomed to life.

We found our way back to irresistible magnetic attraction and you can too!

I’m out to bust a big myth!

You’re not “incompatible”, you just don’t speak each other’s erotic language of arousal.

If I speak French and you speak Chinese, does that make us incompatible?

If we’re attracted to each other or we need something from each other and we speak different languages, do we dismiss each other and say, “We’re just not compatible?


If we’re committed to creating a connection, we learn to speak each other’s language.


Once I knew that Ian was a Kinky/Sensual, I could inspire arousal in Ian by pulling out some ropes or using a little bit of enticing dirty talk.

Once Ian was clear that I was a Sexual/Energetic, he understood what made me feel desired and he could approach me in ways that created powerful turn on.

We learned what we each needed and we took the time to learn the tools, techniques, and strategies that light each other up.

We learned to speak each other’s language of arousal.

Your path to sexual satisfaction is just like a language.

It’s your language of toe-tingling turn-on and it’s time to become fluent, don’t you think?

If you’re having sexual challenges in a current relationship, can recall dissatisfaction in a previous relationship or your looking to make that next love affair the most erotically fulfilling experience you’ve ever had…

It’s time to become erotically multi-lingual.

I would bet that your lover (future, past or present) is not your same Blueprint, or at least their primary Blueprint is not the same as yours.

Each Erotic Blueprint™ has its own specific vocabulary of turn-on and your pathway to mutual ecstasy, deep connection, and deliciously hot sex is to learn how to…

  • Know your and your lover’s Erotic Blueprint™: Awareness is the first step! To claim your pleasure, you need to know your own turn-ons and how to ask for them to be fed. (If you haven’t taken the Erotic Blueprint™ Quiz, you can take it here.
  • Speak your and your lover’s Erotic Blueprint™: What words, vocal tone and tempo, movement and body language bring you to total turn-on?
  • Feed your and your lover’s Erotic Blueprint™: Do you crave space or closeness? What type of touch inspires surrender? Do you wish to submit or dominate? Does taboo drive you wild or is it direct genital touch, penetration, and orgasms that fulfill your needs? What if you crave it all or you desire a delicious blend of styles to take you through waves of never-ending pleasure? How does your partner long to be loved?
  • Heal your and your lover’s Erotic Blueprint™: Emotional and physical trauma can block you from your pleasure. The shadow sides of any of the Blueprint Types may interrupt your arousal and make orgasmic release unattainable. Find help and take the time to heal. Pleasures you never knew existed await!

Your first step is to know your Erotic Blueprint™ Type and, if you have a lover, to learn what type they are. Take the Quiz!

Your next step is to begin to pay attention more deeply to your body. Get curious about what ignites your arousal and when it diminishes or disappears.

Make notes, share with your lover(s). Ask for your needs to be met. Set aside time to play and investigate without an agenda to get someplace.

It’s all information that helps build your vocabulary of arousal.

You’d be amazed what you can learn by setting aside 15 minutes for a little “research” 😉

As your curiosity builds and you want to learn more about all the erotic possibilities available to you, get great mentors.

And pay attention to all the juicy teachings we offer to guide you on the path to erotic fulfillment.

(From now through March 19th, 2018 our Erotic Blueprint Breakthrough™ Course is open for enrollment! This is a deep dive into the skills of Speaking, Feeding and Healing the Blueprints.)

Fill your life with pleasure,